Lately, I have been wanting to read more of the Old Testament and was feeling that I needed to read Nehemiah. No particular reason for it just something within me knew I needed to read this book during this time in my life.
Nehemiah was called to rebuild the walls of Jerusalem at a time when it seemed there was no hope for this city. The Jews had been scattered everywhere and the ones who escaped captivity were in great distress in Jerusalem. (Nehemiah 1:3). God called Nehemiah. He wept for Jerusalem and her desolation and for God’s chosen people. He had vision and a calling.
I have yet to move past the second chapter because I keep going over the first two chapters wondering, praying “Lord, what is it You are wanting me to gain from reading this book?” And I can’t shake the picture of what is being painted about Jerusalem at that time. The walls were broken down and the gates burned. I have been to Jerusalem. I know what it looks like now. I can’t imagine what it looked back then. Hopeless, crushing, defeated, worn out. AH! That’s it… things I can relate to especially now in my life.
At times my life feels like the walls and life of those days in Jerusalem. Hopeless that I will be stuck doing what I am doing at the moment and never moving forward. Crushed by dreams that died long ago, never seeing them come to fruition. Defeated by my own lack of ability to get over myself. And just plain worn out from the fight of it all.
Now I see why I am reading Nehemiah… I need to reset my vision and look to the One that can turn my hopeless, crushed, worn out self and turn it into something more beautiful than I could ever imagine.
Have you felt like this before? Are you there with me? Thoughts? Please share…I would love to read what you have to say! 🙂